Archive | August 2013

No more bullies please

Kids today are not the same as kids of past generations. Today’s kids have so much more to deal with. I am not saying that these same issues were not present in generations past, but they were not as heard of.

I was fortunate enough to go to a school where you very rarely even heard of drugs. And to my knowledge no one ever was busted at school for having drugs on campus. My children go to that same school in that same town, and think I hear about someone getting caught with drugs, or guns, or a knife at least every other week!

When I was younger, kids were mean and picked on each other sure. But not like today. Not where they publicly humiliate each other via the Internet. We were not put on display for the entire world to point at and laugh at.

And I’d like to say that these things, unfortunately, are not just associated with children anymore. Adults can be just as cruel. They too post degrading and humiliating things on public sites causing embarrassment beyond belief.

Where does this stop? When do we as a people step up and say enough!? We are the only ones who can change this. Our children are killing themselves over this!

As parents we MUST teach our children to not only value themselves but others. We need to teach our children how to lift each other up instead of putting each other down. Our children need to know how to firmly stand up for what they believe as well as for their friends and themselves.

We should help our kids learn how to be open and communicate with us, without fear of judgement and harsh words, in the event that they are bullied. As parents we need to give our kids everything they need to survive their teenage years. Be that a shoulder to cry on or a warrior who will help them fight (not physically obviously) to put a stop to the nonsense.

Kids need to know that bullying is not okay. Parents need to know that this is not the same kind of “right of passage” that they went through as a kid either. This is serious. Lets all band together and stop this craziness.

Until next time… live positively Wright!

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Goodbye my dear friend

It is with a heavy heart that I write so late tonight. I am saddened to have to say goodbye to a dear friend and ex- coworker. She left this world to go to her forever home late last night.

She was a wonderful woman. She and I spent numerous hours talking and laughing about our kids. She was always eager to hear new ideas on dealing with the issue (my son and her grandson both being on different levels of the autism spectrum). Likewise she gave me a lot to think about and consider.

She gave the best hugs. The kind you can actually feel the love in. She loved everyone. Always finding the good in everyone she met. I don’t think I EVER heard her say a negative thing about anyone.

When she first became ill i started trying to find a time to go see her, but the illness being such a private matter the family asked that we wait until she got home. By the time she was release from the hospital and able to have visits, I had already been relieved of my position with the company. I had no opportunity to tell her goodbye or good luck.

I had hoped, when I heard that she had become well enough to make plans to return to work, that she would beat the illness. At seven o’clock (CST) this morning I received the news that she did not make it. Yet again I never got the chance to tell my friend goodbye or let her know how very dear she was to me. To say thank you for listening when I needed her. Or to tell her all that she will always mean to me.

So here’s to you Jane. I love you my friend. I pray you are at rest and peace now. Not one day will go by that I will not think of you fondly, and remember all you have taught me. Every time I see a ray of sunshine I will know that it is you looking down on me and those you loved. With you big smile and wonderful laugh. Goodbye my sweet friend. I will see in the forever after.

Shh! We are talking religion

Religion is a touchy subject. Mostly because there are so many views, beliefs, theories, and religions out there. I can remember growing up I was always told not to discuss religion or politics in public unless you want to start a conflict. I can assure you now that is not my desire.

I look at religion differently than most people. Or at least that’s my opinion. I was raised Baptist and much to my mother’s disappointment I married a man who was raised Mormon. You see I, unlike most people, do not believe that one religion is better than another.

I believe in the Bible. In what is says. I believe that as long as a person believes in God, his son Jesus Christ, and the fact that he died on the cross for our sins then they will go to Heaven when they die. Regardless of religion.

I do not believe in other religious books other than the Bible. And I don’t believe that there will be only one religion in Heaven. I think when we get there, there will be people from all walks of life, of all shapes and sizes and colors. The ONLY thing we will have in common will be our belief in God.

To sum it up, it is my belief that if you want to know what you should believe, read the Bible.

Until next time… live positively Wright!

The family alcohol left behind

Many people drink alcohol. For some, it is fine. For others, not so much. Let me begin by saying I have no problem with recreational drinking. As long as you are responsible about it.

However, there are some who can not be responsible. They set out with the intention of drinking only one. But they lack the willpower to stop after one. They pick up another, and then another. At some point they start to slur their words and become so off balance that they can’t walk. Yet they still don’t realize they are drunk.

Drunken people often assume one of two personalities. They either become so mellow and calm that they are relaxed and overly peaceful and agreeable, or they become combative and belligerent. I’ve never known either to be a good fit for a family.

An overly peaceful and agreeable drunk has a tendency to not remember what they agreed to the next day. I have seen them spend so much money agreeing to something that the family must go without necessities for months. They go broke due to one bender. I have even see single people agree to marry people they hardly know because they were drunk. Or if they are married, allow someone of the opposite sex to talk them into a one nighter that is inevitably discovered by the spouse, thus destroying a family.

If they are belligerent and combative they too have a whole slew of issues that can destroy a family. They put loved ones down when they are drunk. Or worse the become physically abusive. They will argue with anyone because they are never wrong and they are invincible.

Either way, when an alcoholic gets drunk they forget about everything but themselves and their alcohol. I once knew a man who had his kids for the weekend (he and his wife were separated) and he was driving around while he was drinking with his small children in the car. A family friend followed him hoping he would stop so he could hopefully get his keys or the kids so that they would be safe. The father pulled into his driveway, opened the car door, let his kids out, and before the friend could even get out of his truck the father sat back down and passed out.

It was well after dark. If the friend hasn’t showed up when he had any number of things could have happened to those kids. While separated the man and his wife had been trying to work things out for the sake of their family. After this incident however, the wife could not in good faith continue with the marriage. So for the sake of her daughters she divorced her husband. Yet another family destroyed by alcoholism.

Alcoholism destroys families in other ways too. Like when a drunk driver hits someone. Whether that someone is in a vehicle or walking. The victim can end up paralyzed, brain damaged, or dead. No matter which, their family is forever changed. Or what if the drunk driver is the one who is severely injured or dead? While they were the person in the wrong their family is still forever changed.

Let me be absolutely clear, I do drink occasionally. But I am responsible. I may have one or two drinks a year and I never drive after I have had a drink. Even one drink can affect your ability to drive. When I do drink I don’t drink fast. I sip my drink so that I don’t finish it and order another and then another. And, I think most importantly, I am informed. I know that alcoholism can run in the family. I do have an uncle who is an alcoholic so I am overly careful when I do decide to drink. I am also married to a recovering alcoholic. He has been sober for six years. I know first hand the damage alcoholism can do to a family.

If you are, or think you may be an alcoholic please get help. Talk to your doctor, clergy, or a family member or friend who you trust. Attend an AA meeting and ask them where you can get the help you need. It may save your life.

If you are a family member of an alcoholic please know you are not alone. Know also, you don’t have to do this alone. There are others of us out there. If you need to talk you can email me. I will listen and offer any advice I can. If I don’t have an answer I WILL dig until I have one. There is also an amazingly helpful group out there called ALANON. Google them. I promise you will be glad you did.

Until next time… live positively Wright!

In Ten Years

Everyone thinks about the future. When setting goals people ask themselves, “where do I see myself in five, ten, or twenty years?” I am no different.

In ten years all of my children will be grown. The youngest will be twenty. So I am hoping I will be a grandmother at least once. I can imagine my grand baby staying the night and me spoiling him or her.

I hope to still be blogging at that time. Hopefully my blog will be well known by then. Maybe it will have even helped someone. Changed a life for the better. After all that is my goal in blogging to begin with.

Hopefully my husband and I will have built our dream house by that point. And maybe I can convince him to make the exterior look like a log cabin. I have always dreamed of a log cabin with a fire place.

Maybe my husband will have the boat he has always wanted, and the truck he will need to tow it. We will take vacations and stay on the boat at night and fish all day. We love the outdoors.

I am pretty content with my life as it is. It is important to learn to be thankful for what you have. I am fortunate to be able to say that I have. So you won’t hear me wish for material things often. Mostly, I wish peace and happiness for my family and friends. If they are happy, feel loved, and at peace then I am happy.

Where do you see yourself in ten years?

Until next time…live positively Wright!